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Top Ten Ways To Keep Your Affair a Secret

 

It does not matter how it happened.  Explain it how you wish, either way, sometimes, two people find themselves in a clandestine relationship and need to keep it secret.  Whether you are hiding an affair from your husband, hiding an affair from your wife, cheating on your girlfriend or cheating on your boyfriend, here are our top tips for keeping your relationship a secret!

How to Keep Affair Secret Tip #1: Don’t add affair as a friend on social media

One of the most important rules of being clandestine is, well, be clandestine!  Resist the urge to add your secret affair on social media sites such as Facebook and Instagram.  When suspicious lovers and partners what to poke around, social media friends and follower’s lists are often the first stop in their investigative process.  Also, it is very difficult to control who is taking pictures of whom.  With today’s tagging and face recognition technology, you can be busted without even realizing you were sloppy.  If you want to keep your affair a secret, don’t be friends on the internet.  It may even throw off a suspicious partner.

How to Keep Affair Secret Tip #2: Clear Your Browser Cache

Often, cheaters are caught because they are sloppy.  If you are trying to hide your online activity, make sure that you clear your internet browser cache and cookies.  If you are searching for gifts for your significant other, do so in your browsers secret, private, or incognito mode.  Otherwise, the next time someone opens up your browser, your internet ads will be prominently displaying those flowers that you ordered.  Sometimes, they even personalize the ads and will suggest that you get “Jill” another wonderful bouquet of flowers.  Avoid the fight and clean up after yourself.

How: In your browser settings, find the incognito or privacy window and launch it.  Keep your activities there.  Also, after each and every session on the computer, clear the browsers history and cookies.

How to Keep Affair Secret Tip #3: Clear Your Cell Phone History

 

Another mistake that people who are having an affair make is that they often do not clear their cell phone logs and call histories.    If you are having a phone intensive relationship, remember that the number you call will appear on your cell phone bill.  You may want to get a “burner” phone, which is a nickname for a prepaid phone that is not connected to you and/or your credit card.  You should make it a practice to purge your call log several times a day.

How to Keep Affair Secret Tip #4: Delete Your Emails

Another way that people get tripped up when trying to hide an affair is by leaving an email trail.  If you are communicating by email, you need to make sure you delete the messages in your inbox.  Also remember, that popular email providers like GMAIL also keep a record of your outbox, so it is a good idea to delete the messages in your outgoing mailbox as well.  Some email providers require you to empty your trash bin in order to get rid of the emails you delete, so don’t overlook the trash bin as you might have to take that extra step to ensure that what you have written and/or received is completely gone.

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How to Keep Affair Secret Tip #5: Don’t Send messages at all!!!!!

If you have to write to each other, and you have to write long letters, which of course, you should never do, consider not sending the emails at all.  Create an email account to which only you and your lover have the password and login information.  Then write away, except, when you are finished with your letter, don’t hit send.  Never hit send.  Instead, save the email as a draft.  Then it will go into the draft folder.  You can update each other that an email exists via text message.  Once each party reads the letter, that party should delete the draft.  Of course, this is based on trust.  Either of you can send or print the emails.  However, that was the case if you were just writing each other.  Here, if that does happen, there is no actual proof that you have any connection to the account.  This was one of the ways that David Patraeus allegedly communicated with his mistress during his affair.  Remember to empty the trash.

Check out this article on Rules David Petraeus broke during his affair: CLICK HERE FOR TIPS ON KEEPING YOUR CHEATING A SECRET FROM THE DAILY BEAST

(David Petraeus was the Director of the CIA who was having the affair and then everyone found out – oh..yeah…that guy…)

How to Keep Affair Secret Tip #6: Don’t spend time close to home

If you are going to cheat or have an affair, you should never do so in your own backyard.  It is very easy to get caught if you are cheating and meeting your lover close to home.  Remember the episode of Orange is the New Black in which Piper finds out her Dad was cheating?  She is sneaking into a movie with a friend and sees her father leaving the movie theater with a woman who was not her mother.  People notice.  People love to gossip.  Go to towns and places that are not close to your home and/or place of business.  If you are going to parks, go to big parks and try to stay out of big crowds.  It is easy to hide in a crowd, but it is also easy to be spotted and not even know it.  Stay away from places that you would go to with your significant other.  Don’t repeat dates with either one in the same place.  Ever.

How to Keep Affair Secret Tip #7: Use Cash, Not Credit

If Cash is not always an option, open a new bank account at a bank that is not near your home and use the debit card.  Sign up for paperless statements.  Send the receipts to a secret email account.  Cash however, is king, especially when you are having an affair or cheating.  Using credit cards is the same as leaving a big note in chalk that says, “JILL AND I ATE HERE” and your significant other WILL FIND IT!  If you are getting the cash from bank accounts that your significant other can monitor or has access to, never withdraw large amounts of cash and never withdraw it on the day that you are seeing your affair.  This is important.  ATM records not only show activity, they can show where that activity took place and help your snooping significant other catch you in the act.  Change up your methods.  Keep making small withdrawals on the days prior to your meet ups.  Nothing screams “I AM CHEATING” like an ATM withdrawal at the HOOK UP MOTEL.  Stranger things have appeared on bank and credit card statements.

How to Keep Affair Secret Tip #8: Never in your own house

 

You know all those shows that are popular right now like CSI and NCIS with all the forensics and stuff?  There is a reason they are popular.  People LOVE to solve mysteries.  People also always unknowingly leave evidence of their presence.  Hair, fluids, gum wrappers, garbage, accessories, glitter, scents, and the like are all items that can raise a significant other’s antenna.  That being the case, NEVER, EVER, have an affair in your own house if you can help it.  You can always help it.  There are multiple reasons that one of the best ways to hide an affair or to hide the fact that you are cheating is to refrain from doing things in your own house.  The first, as mentioned earlier, is clear: EVIDENCE!  The second is a little more emotional – if you get caught, your significant other may see the affair having happened in his/her own house and in his/her own bed as not just being disrespectful, but as an additional crime against him/her.  This can be really bad for your future with your significant other.  He or she may have a hard time staying in the house.  Also, the house then becomes a potential trigger factor for fights and arguments.  It will retain the taint of your affair.  It is easier to get caught where someone knows your will be and where someone can position themselves in a secret location while waiting.  Your house is one of those places, no matter what you think.

How to Keep Affair Secret Tip #9: Save your affair’s name in your phone as a new gender neutral name

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If you are going to cheat or have an affair and talk to the other person on the phone, at least be smart about it.  Don’t save the person in your phone with their name.  The best way to hide their calls and/or messages in the short term is to give that person a gender neutral name.  If you are a man cheating with a female, give the person a male name.  If you are a woman cheating with a man, give the man a girls name, and so on.  This will at least lesson the initial suspicions should you be getting a call in front of your significant other and not pick up.  When the name flashes on the screen and you choose not the answer your lover’s call, it will not be as suspicious if the person’s name is gender neutral.  There are other methods.  You can save the person with the name of a popular debt collector or utility service, such as a cable company.  This will make it look like multiple calls are just representative of the horrible time you are having with your cable.

How to Keep Affair Secret Tip #10: Deny to the end

People often confess inadvertently.  Sometimes it is because they feel guilty.  Sometimes it is because they believe someone has information.  Unless you have 100% confirmation that something is the case, do not confess.  Police officers often use tactics to get suspects to give information.  Significant others are no different.  For example, a police officer will ask how many drinks someone has had, and when someone says a number other than zero, it is an admission they have been drinking.  This is an example of a question that gives someone information they are looking for without asking for the information directly.  Beware of this type of question or conversation in particular.

How to Keep Affair Secret Tip #11: If you get caught, you are caught, decide how to proceed but NEVER, EVER, discuss the sordid details

Ok, so this is an extra tip.  However, it really isn’t related to keeping the affair secret.  This involves a situation where you were cheating or having an affair and you get caught.  In such a situation, never discuss the details of the affair.  No matter how forgiving you think that your partner is, never get baited into telling him or her what happened, where it happened, how it happened, etc.  If you are going to move on, the best way to do so is to either end the relationship and move on, or apologize and commit to working towards building a future.  No good will come of living in the past and having your significant other relive what happened and add to it in his/her imagination.  This is probably going to happen anyway.  If you decide to stay, apologize, understand that your significant other will have some issues with what has happened and may need time to heal, but there is no healing in pulling a scab off.  When you give details of love affairs with others, you do just that, you pull scabs off healing wounds.

Good Luck.  You will need it.  You my friend, are a douche!  Enjoy.

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